Puritans on Jeopardy

This assignment was to use the Puritan characters from the Crucible, a drama by Arthur Miller about the Salem Witch Trials. You had to write a scene for the Crucible in play format, but in a modern day setting. I chose to set them in a Jeopardy show.

(A dark stage in a wide room.

Waiting in hush is a live audience staring intently at the stage. Lights flash on and center on the stage to reveal Alex Trebek, who grins brightly at the camera and introduces himself. There’s a sound of fidgeting near the lecterns behind him. The lights and cameras center on these now to reveal three dark clad figures. They are all dressed in dark, simple Puritan clothing and keeping their eyes down in attempt to keep the awe from their faces.)

Trebek. And our three contestants this evening are: Abigail Williams, John Proctor, and John Hale! (He gestures to Abigail first, then Proctor, and finally Hale.) Now, who’s ready to play Jeopardy? (The crowd roars, and revealed in the front of the crowd are Mr. Parris, Mary Warren, and Elizabeth Proctor). Alright, let’s begin! Abigail will go first, choose a category.

Abigail (Has gained composure faster than her fellows, and decided to play along). What be they, these categories? How might I progress?

Trebek (Not losing his smile). You are going to pick from the categories on the board, and I will supply you with the answer to a question, while you will supply the question belonging to that answer.

Abigail (Intrigued). How peculiar. Speech?

Trebek (Unsure of his contestants).  After his defeat at Waterloo, he told his army “Be always gallant and good… Do not forget me”. ( Abigail remains silent, puzzled. A buzzer rings out behind her.)

Trebek. Mr. Proctor?

Proctor. Waterloo?

Trebek. Mr. Hale.

Hale. I know not, sir.

Trebek (Retaining composure). The answer is Napoleon. Ms. Williams, are you ready?

Abigail (More determined). Aye, sir. B.P.? Six hundred. Dollars?

Trebek (Amused). Oh yes, dollars. Now here’s the clue: To make dough rise, this can be used as a substitute for yeast.

Abigail (Arrives at her answer rapidly). Baking powder?

Trebek (His grin widens, looking somewhat relieved). Correct! (Abigail smiles, satisfied).

Mary Warren. Oh, that girl. Tis venom that runs through her veins! She deserveth not even to compete against two such men.

Elizabeth Proctor (Angrily). Aye, we are agreed. The girl is deceit and belongeth not there.

Parris (Fuming silently to himself). Both ye be correct in your ramblings. Tis no place for a woman there, let alone a girl. Certain as the day is long it should be me competin’ with them, for I would pose an opponent equal and more.

Abigail (Seems to gather it is her turn again and looks to the board searchingly). Antonyms of Bible books. Four hundred.

Trebek. Conclusion.

Abigail (Pauses and the buzzer rings. She glances down ashamedly).

Trebek. Mr. Proctor?

Procter. (Unsure). Revelation?

Trebek. Yes, antonyms of Bible books. Mr. Hale?

Hale (With pride). Genesis.

Trebek. That is correct!

Hale (Ambitiously). Twelve hundred.

Trebek. Influx.

Hale. (Allows for the buzzer, disappointedly).

Trebek. Abigail?

Abigail (Confused). Aye… Influx… (The Jeopardy song plays loudly, breaking her concentration then the buzzer goes off).

Elizabeth Proctor (To herself). Come, John! Tis only the Bible!

Proctor (Hearing Elizabeth, straightens). Ah, well. Exodus?

Trebek. That’s right!

Proctor (Gazes at the audience giddily). Two thousand! (He put this out determinedly, but nervous.)

Trebek. All right, the Bible name that is the antonym for “Joyful utterances”.

Proctor. Lamentations.

Trebek. Right, still your turn, John.

Proctor (Searches the board). Other red, white, and blue flags? Twelve hundred.

Trebek. The historic arms of Dubrovnik are included on this Balkan country's red, white & blue striped flag.

Proctor. I know not.

Trebek. Mr. Hale?

Hale (Disappointedly). Neither I.

Trebek. The answer is Croatia. (The three contestants glance at one another in astonishment.)

Abigail. Croatia, sir? What country is that?

Trebek. A Balkan one. (Trebek reiterates tiredly, seeing that he is losing them again).

Abigail. Sculptures?

Trebek. In architecture, a column in the form of a man is called one of these, like a supportive Greek giant.

Abigail (As the Jeopardy song begins to play). In arch… Archii- (Buzzer after which each of her comrades misses the question).

Trebek. Mr. Proctor?

Proctor: Add a Letter for six hundred.

Trebek. Add a letter to "peal" to get this bike part.

Proctor. And what be a bike?

Trebek. No, that’s… That’s not the answer… (Finally gives up on his contestants). Well folks, we seem to have run out of time. Join us next time to see who wins -  Jeopardy!